Wednesday, November 11, 2020

2020, The Year Of The Saddest Thanksgiving?


 Lately,  Cheryl and I have been overwhelmed with people telling us about how to handle Thanksgiving during a year of the Great Pandemic.   They range everywhere from "what types of food" to "which  gatherings to attend" and "what to do when you get together," but they all have a single thing in common: Prepare for "Sadness".  


Oh really?    You millennials and your Food magazines.   If you can't eat the gourmet foods with the cluster of hipster friends,  then you have to reinvent things to be more socially aware.   And Since Thanksgiving marks the advent of the "European's Conquest of the Americas" then we should apparently be ashamed of such a celebration.   Bon Appetit suggests that the age old Term: Stuffing is a word only "White people use." to refer to dressing.  Way to go "Woke" former favorite food magazine!


But aside from that.   This year seems to have everyone wanting to get away from the family and friends gathering to eat Turkey and potatoes and stuffing and pies and all the other goodies that Americans only eat once a year.  ( Seriously!  Who eats Turkey all year?  Even though it IS the best thing for sandwiches!) And While they are at it...  Ditching the Turkey altogether!  And instead, having something ethnic and "Non-Traditional".  Something that shows how virtuous and Aware we all are.... Like Tacos!  Or Kimchi... Or Tofu or Non-gluten Vegan cakes!

Thanksgiving for two? 

But you people know NOTHING!   Cheryl and I have already had to endure the Saddest of Thanksgiving days ever!   When we first moved to Iowa, we shared a single Pot pie on a cardboard box.   Try topping that!    The following year,  we celebrated it with a Rotisserie Chicken.   I mean...  How were two people supposed to eat an entire turkey anyway?  It certainly made sense at the time, but it did not make the mood any more festive. 


Since that time,  Cheryl has vowed to make Thanksgiving more festive.... Even on the years when we can not be back in Michigan with friends and Family. ( Which is looking like it will happen again, this year) So we have been attending Turkey Trots and traveling to distant places to sample foods, meet people and attend festivals that are NOT in our small 600 sq. ft. apartment.   However, even Racing is off the table this year.  Looks like all we have to look forward to is the food. 

Which got us thinking:   What would be the most depressing foods that you could possibly use to celebrate Thanksgiving?  Other than the above mentioned "Pot pie on a Paper plate"( Paper plate being Key to that story...)  and a Single Rotisserie Chicken,  what other meals would be equally depressing? 

Chicken nuggets and Tater Tots!  Technically,  Chicken is still a bird.  And Tots are from Potatoes.   You could even supplement them with Dolly Madison Fruit pies and a chilled Fresca. If you are stuck eating food out of the freezer,  This combo might do. 

Hotdogs!   Nothing says baseball or camping quite like hotdogs.   But eating Hotdogs for Thanksgiving really does take the Magic out of the experience.  They are cheap.  Ready in minutes, and you can even fix them up to add a little excitement, if Catsup and Mustard is not fulfilling enough.   But no matter how much Chili and Onions you put on them,  they will never measure up to Mom's Dry Turkey and Rolls.


Mac and Cheese!  Ok, You have officially given up.    On Thanksgiving.... On Holidays... And probably on Life!    The only people who eat Macaroni and Cheese willingly are 6 year-olds and College freshmen who have never learned how to cook.   And I don't care what the Kraft Marketing Teams would have you believe,  Mac and Cheese is not "a Healthy and Nutritious snack you can eat as a meal."   It is survival food.... and only barely that.  And if Survival is not really an option,  would you really want that as your last meal? 

TV Dinner for One.   Nothing is more depressing than the single person trying to hang on to the memories of yester-year... With Food!  I actually think it would be more fulfilling to volunteer at a Homeless Shelter on Thanksgiving than eat one of these.  At least you would not be alone.  And who knows,  you might actually gain a little perspective on your fellow human being that will make it worthwhile.  


After re-reading this, it is beginning to sound a little depressing.  Maybe I went a little too far.   It was suppose to be light hearted and funny.  I could re-write it, but that would just be wrong.  ( and too much work)  Besides.  Most people already know that the real Way to celebrate Thanksgiving it to be Grateful for what we have.  And even the most basic food would have probably been a God Send for the first Pilgrims.  We should be thankful we live in the Greatest Country in the world.  America!  Yes America.  The U S of A.  And Thanksgiving is a Holiday unique to OUR history. Sharing a Pot pie on a cardboard box in Iowa when we first got here sounds almost comical now.  But at the time, we were happy we could afford that!  It is a reminder of Dark times and how we survived them.  


So...  Positive note here:   If you can't be with friends and family this year.  And you can't STUFF YOURSELF on Mom's Turkey, Cranberries, and cornbread stuffing... ( The Stuffing was the BEST!)  You can at least be grateful that you have a home, a meal, a family that loves you... somewhere.   AND maybe you will enjoy the quiet that NOT being with noisy relatives brings. (Although,  I think that is one of the best things about being with family....  )  We live in a country now where the food finds YOU.   We do not have to hunt and gather, grow and harvest...  We just order online or pick things up at Convenience stores.   So easy!   Even during a Pandemic with Lockdowns!   Try that in Africa, or Cambodia, or Central China...  


On that,  I will briefly mention that today was Veteran's day.  I got a free cup of Coffee and 15% off our groceries at HyVee!  And just when I thought giving up three years of my life was not worth anything.  

By the way,  Trying to find depressing/ sad Food pictures for this post was virtually impossible!  No one posts "Sad Food Pics" on the internet!   That should tell you something about this country we call home.  

4 comments:

Far Side of Fifty said...

Thank you for your service! Hope you all do better than a pot pie this year. I have a 8 1/2 pound Turkey Breast can you say leftovers...but like you said it makes good sandwitches:) I didn't know about stuffing being a white word:) Who knew!
I think my most miserable Thanksgiving was during a blizzard..not sure what year sometime between 1976 and 1980. My Aunt fell while cooking Thanksgiving dinner...was transported to a hospital far from home to the town where we lived. The next call was my Uncle saying their son was in an snowmobile accident. My Aunt was in a halo and on a stretcher bed suspended and flipped every so often, I had to tell her that her son was in surgery and was with her when the a$$ hole Dr came in and told her that her son would never walk again. Two broken necks in just a few hours of each other. They have both since died.
So this year will be happy compared to that year!

The Great Ethan Allen said...

Goodness! That IS tragic! I forgot about the one I spent in Alaska all alone on CQ while everyone else was on leave. I figured I would save money on a plane ticket because I was getting out within the next couple of months. I didn't know how bad being alone would feel. But I managed to survive it. And I can sill walk... so I'm thankful for that! Sometimes Holidays are not as happy as they should be... So they don't need any help from pandemics or Governments to make them worse... Hehe.

Val Ewing said...

Hotdogs! One year while Ex husband was on duty as a fireman, we had no $$$. The kids and I made hotdogs for Thanksgiving with chips. We made Koolaid and packed everything up and took it to the living room and had a pretend picnic with the dogs.
Ex was furious with me, the kids thought I was awesome.
One other time after divorce, the kids and I had TV dinners and I let the boys cook it themselves.
Both are better Thanksgivings than any huge family get together full of playing nice with relatives.
Great post and I loved it! Thank you!

Jon said...

I remember once,long ago, when I had a TV dinner on Thanksgiving. Can it get any worse than that? Even though I'll be having Thanksgiving alone (with my cats, of course), I plan to have something reasonably nice. I really LOVE turkey, but it's too much trouble to make. Perhaps I'll have a small ham....I'm not sure.

I'm wondering if turkeys will be required to wear masks this year??

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